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#4 ~
David Hasselhoff
aka :
The Hoff
Shame Shame, everybody knows your name. Your the Hoff.
Now you might be wondering how David Hasselhoff has been able to move so far up on the prestigious JackAss list seeing how he hasn't been in the news or tabloids all that much, but boy o boy when he does get there it's a doozy. (That's right, we said "doozy")
His drunken cheeseburger fiasco had millions voting him into the JackAss top 10. His poor daughter caught between two worlds of evil and deceit. Desperately seeking her daddy's love... she asks him, "daddy when are you going to stop killing yourself?"
Hasselhoff answers in a drunken cheeseburger stuffed voice, by doing his rendition of "Nobudy nose da truble i seen"
However, believe it or not this shameless act of stupidity only got The Hoff a JackAss nomination. What pushed him into the coveted number 4 spot was his gold membership into the 'stars-that-have-sunk-so-low-they-have-no-choice-but to-desperately-rely-on-Reality-Television-to-rectify-their-rotting-dignity-deprived- careers' club by being a judge on America's got Talent.
By signing his soul over to Trailer Trash reality television Hasselhoff joins the honorable company of people like Jerry Springer, Paris Hilton, Jessica Simpson, and the late Anna Nichole Smith. People who have all refurbished their careers by selling their dignity.
But then again what do you expect from an old shotty drunk, displaced and divorced?
We're sure David would be the first one to say, "You have no right to judge me!"
Well Dave, when you put yourself on reality T.V. posing as a "judge" you give us that right. America might not have talent, but at least we still have pride.
