Last week we told you about John Mayer posting about a possible bromance hook-up with Pete "pansy" Wentz.  Well guess who got a visit from the Freak Fairy?

        Wentz showed up with his guitar and a box of gay kinky circus Twister covered in bubble wrap.  Cus you know Asslee can't bend like she used to being prego and all.

 

        Jennifer Aniston's friends and family (The Jenpire) is not taking the public remarks made by John John lying down damn it! 

       They have come out to say that John Mayer is a no good, two-timing, young whipper snapper.  Ok maybe they didn't use those words exactly, but ya'll know that's how cougars talk.

        Actually they told the press:  

"Jen will never kiss and tell, but it's she who ended the relationship."

They added that Mayer's "childish behavior only confirms she was right to dump him. Now he's acting like a spoiled child. Expect Jen to behave like a lady."

       A lonely, divorced, middle-aged depressed lady who fucks around with musicians 10 years younger than her like a diseased-ridden groupie whore, but still a lady all the same.      

       They continue *sigh* by saying:

"He has a relationship with certain paparazzi (and) bloggers. He tips them off. He loves the attention. Jen didn't want to believe it was happening, but it was, and she has no tolerance for that."

The claim, "Jen was tired of paying for everything. Cobwebs come flying out of (Mayer's) wallet when he opens it. John liked living like a movie star when he was with her. Jen would never say anything, but you could tell it irritated her."

"We're talking about a guy who had a car waiting to take him home in New York, but he chose to walk so he could talk to the press (along the way). He'll drag this out until there's someone new."

        Well then, it's a damn good thing that you responded to him.  That oughta shut him up.  We know...we know... "but he started it."        

 

        Jennifer Aniston (39) is ruing the day she met John Mayer (30).  Ruing I say.

       John is addressing the rumors that he is an alleged "man whore" and also wants to nonchalantly point out that it was HIM that dumped her.

       Johnny boy tells Ok Magazine:

        Wow that's cool, cus there's more shit coming out of your mouth than out of your ass.  Now that he cleared up who the executioner was he goes on to explain why he broke an old lady's heart:

"People have different chemistry, they have different lives. It's not about years, it's about going out with somebody, being truthful on the way in, being truthful in the middle and being truthful on the way out. You're either a cheater or you break up and I'm not the first, I'm the second. And that's it. There's no lying, there's no bullshit."

        You know... If back-peddling were an Olympic sport Michael Phelps would be kissing John Mayer's ass right now.  John would win Gold, Silver and Bronze.  He'd be lying on all three podiums with a little a marijuana reef on his head and one little 1/2 leaf covering his peepee and one descended testicle.

       

        Jennifer Aniston (39) is spreading shit all over town that she's the one that broke up with John Mayer (30) because his favorite song was "Pop Goes My Penis".

       The Chicago Sun-Times reports:

        She's looking for stability but she gives her men a "three strikes" rule to fuck other women???  Hmmm I believe a couple of Harvard PhDs might be able to figure out why this bitch's relationships aren't working out.

        She should try dating Alex Rodriguez... I heard he's suddenly available and never strikes out. 

        39 yrs old and still a dumb ass.

       

        While Brad and Angelina are creating a beautiful family and being paid millions for their pictures... lowly exwife Jennifer Aniston (39) just got her ass dumped by John Mayer (30). 

        A source told the Daily Mirror:

"John took the decision to end things as he felt he just wasn't ready for the level of commitment that Jennifer deserved due to his traveling. Contrary to reports, Jen didn't want to have kids or marry this year, but she did want to set a timetable for their future together. Initially Jennifer was furious when he told her of his decision but now she's simply sad - not to mention a little heartbroken."

        See that's how old school players do shit.  They don't just "Hit It n Quit It"... They hit it, fly to the other side of the world, hide all their shit.....and then quit it via blackberry.

 

 

        We start today right where we left off yesterday.

        The Olympics are upon us so how nice of Johnny Depp to pass the torch from France to Johnny Mayer (30) in the good ole U.S. of A.

         Mayer gets on his tour bus and salutes the pappos. 

        What happened to that happy-go-lucky spirit Johnny boy?

        I guess Aniston doesn't dig the new Afghan refugee hairdo. 

 

        John Mayer (30) shaved off his Mary Tyler Moore hairdo before a concert in Irvine, CA this weekend.  That's right bitches, Jennifer Anniston threw down the law.  Only one feminine bitch allowed in this relationship.

        Is it just me or is that the same hairdo that Brad Pitt had during Mr. and Mrs. Smith, when he broke up with Aniston?!?!

        RUN JOHNNY RUN!!!!  Hide your testicles. 

 

        My Booty's Like Wonderbread singer, John Mayer (30) has been feeling lonely after breaking up with his true love... the pappos.

        A source told MSNBC's The Scoop that John has been tipping off the paps to his whereabouts but they can't be bothered. The source said, “He thinks he’s famous as Jen now. Last week he went to a party, tipped off the paps, and even had decoy cars at the ready when he was leaving. Nice, but no one bothered to follow them, which made John think he ‘lost’ everyone, when really no one bothered to follow him.”

        Wow...that's a little bit pathetic.  Hey you can still play gayelle twister with Perez Hilton and Pete "pansy" Wentz.